tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-748179198768535574.post3400347536549469054..comments2023-03-31T06:31:01.370-07:00Comments on The Lioness at the Gate: How School Didn't Help Me Prepare for MotherhoodEmilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11450808986911204788noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-748179198768535574.post-3025001942744147812013-05-28T11:33:34.710-07:002013-05-28T11:33:34.710-07:00Just a detail: I pretty much refused to cook, yet...Just a detail: I pretty much refused to cook, yet I would clean and was pretty good at it (although I was a snot and would procrastinate until my mom finally just did it). Even now I don't mind cleaning (at least when I'm not terribly interrupted). <br /><br />When I went to college, although my mom told me how to do laundry and I probably started the machine once at home prior, once I got to college I needed roommates to give me a refresher course. It wasn't hard to catch onto, but I think my mom just preferred to get it all done at once. However, we did do laundry folding (I'm sure we could have done more). So, maybe I've struggled because I rejected the teaching my mother offered, and she didn't push. She also enjoyed doing it her way and would rather keep the peace. Pros and cons there, definitely. As for budget, I felt like I went into the world with a full handle on that. My dad taught classes on budgeting and money, so I felt pretty prepared with that one.Emilyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11450808986911204788noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-748179198768535574.post-62037781648704711122013-05-28T11:28:41.958-07:002013-05-28T11:28:41.958-07:00Yeah, I don't know that I'd want school to...Yeah, I don't know that I'd want school to teach the direct motherhood/parenting stuff, but I'm just wondering if the structure could be modified to reflect real life, whether that be workforce or home.<br /><br />Anyway, I couldn't agree more with your last paragraph! I have to think back, did my mom teach me? I'm sure she tried, but I think I was the one to reject it. Because I was successful at the school side of things I dismissed the home side of things, so I think I can say that some of my difficult adjustment is my own fault.Emilyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11450808986911204788noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-748179198768535574.post-67554506490413865022013-05-28T11:13:38.623-07:002013-05-28T11:13:38.623-07:00I don't think school is really the place to le...I don't think school is really the place to learn about parenting or motherhood. I think that needs to come from home. At home, we model the things we want to teach our children. I'm happy with the two separate spheres. I feel like my mom did a good job of teaching me chore management, cooking skills, time mangagement, working together etc. But I like how you think about traits that could be developed in a meaningful in a school setting to enhance family teachins. <br /><br />But your list also raises some questions for me. Unfortunately, kids are not learning skills about parenting/homemaking/etc. at home. So should the school be the default choice? Do we emphasize it more at church? <br /><br />I think we can definitely see the problems that we face in our society because these skills aren't being learned anywhere, not at home and certainly not at school. <br /><br />My son is currently taking a life skills class where they have a babysitting unit, cooking unit, and budgeting and finance unit. I'm gratified that I've already taught him more than the course requires. He is enormously frustrated that despite the fact that he has demonstrated his real ability with these skills, he is still required to take the course. I keep reminding him that many of things are simply not taught at home. Many families seem to emphasize school over anything else practical.<br /><br />I have long thought that one of the reasons so many women struggle with staying at home is that they aren't adequately prepared for the reality of on-site motherhood/homemaking. Formal education, while certainly great for the mind isn't always so great for the real practical skills everyone needs to know to be able to keep a clean house, deal with kids, eat well, budget, etc.Tiffany Wacaserhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08224661646987749451noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-748179198768535574.post-66658875482228361422013-05-27T22:20:07.753-07:002013-05-27T22:20:07.753-07:00Excellent points!
For me, I learned the mothering...Excellent points!<br /><br />For me, I learned the mothering stuff from my own mother, and my extra mothers, and didn't expect it to be much like my formal school experiences. I do use some of my formal school stuff now, but mostly? It's been a process of learning to LIVE, rather than work for external motivators or approval. Some days, I think I do an alright job. Others, the 17 years I've put into mothering don't seem to have taught me much yet. :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com