Saturday, March 6, 2021

Raising Helpful Children

 I saw this article on NPR this morning while I was scrolling before getting out of bed.  Are We Raising Unhelpful, Bossy Kids? Here's The Fix

For decades, scientists have documented a surprising phenomenon: In many cultures around the world, parents don't struggle to raise helpful, kind kids. From ages 2 to 18, kids want to help their families. They wake up in the morning and voluntarily do the dishes. They hop off their bikes to help their dad carry groceries into the house. And when somebody hands them a muffin, they share it with a younger sibling before taking a bite themselves.

. . .I realized there are two key practices that parents, all around the world, use to teach children to be helpful and cooperative. And yet many American parents (including the one writing this essay) often do just the opposite. . . .

Basically, the concept is that when kids are little, we need to let them help when they are interested. For example, if we are scrambling eggs, let them try it. If we are cleaning, let them try it---even if they won't do as good a job as we would like.

The second suggestion is to regularly (like three times an hour) ask your kids to help in little ways, even as small as opening the door for you, or handing you a spoon while you are cooking. This helps them learn good cooperation skills.

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