Yesterday I met some really neat women over at Empowering LDS Women. As I was new to the site, I took a little time to read some old posts. There was one entitled "Feminist Pet Peeve" and I just had to read it. Karissa, the author commented that it drove her nuts receiving things addressed to Mr. and Mrs. (husband's name).
I just had to laugh! I used to feel the same way. It also drove me insane when we'd be at a social gathering, people would ask my husband what he did, and then completely glaze over me as if I had nothing to contribute to society.
However, I don't know what has changed over the last couple years. For some reason, I now feel honored when someone addresses me as Mrs. (my husband's name). Perhaps it's that I've delved in too much history; maybe it's that since I "just" stay home, I like being attached to his public successes; possibly it's that I just love him so much that I like being "claimed" by him (for lack of a better word); perhaps it's that if I do something stupid, I can blame him (I jest!).
I told my husband my thoughts last night, and he gave a sincere, but sappy, "oooohhh" [that is so sweet]. He admitted that it still does bug him, though, because I do, in fact, have a name, and I am my own person.
A few minutes later as I was thinking how I was honored to take his name, I also realized another name we take: Jesus Christ's -- at baptism. I thought, I need to be just as honored to bear His name as I am my husband's -- and show it. I'm sure most of those "Titus 2"/"Biblical Womanhood" ladies have already discovered this, as they so clearly understand the symbolism of Christ being the bridegroom and us all being the bride.
Now, just a last side note: As for being skipped over regarding what I do at social gatherings, as long as I know there are other mothers in the room, it doesn't bug me all that much anymore, either. My husband can be the "popular" one, and I know I can automatically relate to the other mothers there without making a grand introduction. Now if I'm at a academic or career-type function, I do feel a bit of an inferiority complex. It is sad, and hopefully I'll grow out of that someday. For the meantime, though, I'll try and remember our similarities as discussed in Similarities and Differences.
1 comment:
Oh wow, I love that, taking on my husband's name, as a honor, like we take the name of Christ. I just read an article where all the women were whining about how they felt they had to take on their husbands name and they wanted to keep their maiden name. I have never been bothered by taking on my husband's name, in fact I loved doing it. It was like I was comming to him, and he was taking me (I don't know how to describe it). Anyway, I love how you just said that. Thanks!
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